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[15.10] Science
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*Test Subject*
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Having grown nearly immune to the electroshock stimulus, the ESP research team
is finally convinced that ____ has absolutely no psychic powers whatsoever.
So she's been moved on to the Theoretical Color Research division, where her
first test involves nothing more than sitting in a sterile test room, selecting
one of two colored lengths of licorice and ingesting it. Should ____ eat the
red licorice or the blue licorice?
"Red"
____ surveys the brightly lit testing room, noting the oddly shaped glass
table strangely reminiscent of dental equipment. Lost in thought, a soft voice
comes on over the crackling loud speaker reminding ____ that the choice is
simple: the red licorice or the blue licorice. ____ turns a blank start to
the one-way mirror, picks up the red licorice and tosses it into her mouth. A
few seconds pass and there's still no answer from the scientists behind the
mirror. ____ gets up to leave, but the wall speaker hums to life and informs
her that she's made the wrong decision and will no longer be needed in the
experiment. ____'s lost her job.
"Blue"
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*Lab Assistant*
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____'s been given a large amount of test suites to run. Normally she's used
to having a bit of free rein in the lab, fixing up some of the machinery,
playing with the mice and with Wiki the signing chimpanzee, but now all of a
sudden the lead researcher has ____ running these simple and formulaic tests
that even Wiki could do, and ____'s not so happy about it. Then it occurs to
her that Wiki the signing chimpanzee COULD run the test suites! After all, all
they are is a bunch of checkboxes, one after the other. ____ never pays much
attention to them anyways. Should ____ let Wiki do the test suites, or take a
stand for herself and tell her boss what she thinks?
"Let Wiki"
"Speak Mind"
_____ marches down the long hallway of test subjects, past the cubicles of lab
assistants, all crammed together, sometimes 2 or 3 Sims per cube, and right
into her boss's office. Without even waiting for him to look up from his
latte, _____ launches into her tirade, explaining that she is a valuable
research asset, and that she considers it waste of her time, as well as an
insult, that she has to spend five minutes of her day, every day, verifying
that gravity does in fact still function in SimCity and then checking off the
appropriate check box on her long list of test suites. The Lead Researcher
looks over the list and tosses it into his circular filing drawer, informing
_____ that the whole process was just a test to measure her capacity for
independent thinking. _____'s passed and is promoted to Field Researcher.
"Speak Mind"
____ grabs up the test suites and marches down the corridor to the Lead
Researcher's office. She goes to open the door, but stop short and pauses
in thought. She tears the pages to shreds, dumps them unceremoniously on the
floor, produces a book of matches, and lights them ablaze. Content that she's
made her point, ____ returns to the laboratory and goes about fixing the focal
lens on a malfunctioning microscope. It isn't long before the Lead Researcher
appears, still coughing, and asks if ____ had anything to do with the small
bonfire recently constructed outside of his office door. ____ stands her
ground, explains her issues with the test suites, and is immediately demoted
to Test Subject.
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*Field Researcher*
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In a remote section of the SimCity outback ____ has come upon a previously
undiscovered entranceway to an outcropping of ruins built into the base of a
mountain and covered by dense jungle foliage. This is a major discovery, but
____ isn't sure how to proceed. Should he enter the ruins by himself and
attempt to ascertain their nature, or head back to the institute and inform
some of the more distinguished archaeologists of the ruins' existence?
"Go In"
"Get Help"
____ takes one last and closer look at the giant stone archway, and even with
his limited knowledge of ancient glyphic languages, is able to ascertain
immediately that the highly complex writings are of no language ever seen
before. ____ hurries back to civilization and informs the institute's
archaeologists that he has found the remains of what appears to be an "Alien"
civilization. He takes the pack of scientists, each one giddier than the next,
to the site, and it is immediately clear to them that ____'s discovery may be
one of the most important findings in the modern era. The Archaeologists
confer and ask him to supervise further investigations into the Alien ruins,
promoting____ to Project Leader.
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*Project Leader*
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While reading through some of his team's reports, ____ realizes that one of
his researchers has inadvertently stumbled upon a new lithium isotope. Not
only is the discovery of a major find in and of itself, but the practical
applications of the isotope in devices such as atomic linear accelerators and
staplers will be worth a fortune. So it is that ____ finds himself with a bit
of a conundrum. Ethics would obviously say that he should inform the
researcher of her own discovery and advise her how to proceed, but practicality
says that no one ever got ahead in the world of science by sticking to the
rules, and ____ could easily claim the discovery himself without anyone being
the wiser.
"Inform"
____ calls the young researcher into his office and presents her the report
he's been reading. The researcher isn't sure what todo, but ____ directs her
to a few of the bits he's highlighted and then to a section of the periodic
table, then back to the report, and the fledgling researcher's eyes light up,
"I've, I've discovered a new isotope! And it's a good one!" ____ smiles, and
the researcher thanks him profusely, saying she could have never done it
without him. She further promises to give him a percentage from the proceeds
of the first technical patent, and by the end of the day ____ has a check in
his hands for §7,500.
"Steal"
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*Inventor*
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Locked in the basement of the institute's advanced technologies wing, ____ is
hard at work and convinced that at any moment she'll make the breakthrough that
will allow her to build the better mouse-trap. But amidst the confusion of her
piles of parts and stacks of design specs, she's forgotten whether to connect
the Dervosian wicket receptacle to the coupled power inverter or to the focal
spline reticulation intake valve. Which one should see connect it to?
"Power Inverter"
"Intake Valve"
____ reaches back behind the ordovicater, remembering to avoid making contact
with either the depth defier or the multi-valved node indicator, and grabs
hold of the focal spline reticulation valve's negative terminal. She carefully
grounds the Dervosian wicket receptacle to a lug nut on the engine block and
slides it into place, taking extra caution to bend the wicket so that it fits
snugly within the hub of the intake valve's terminal. ____ moves behind the
blast shield and throws the switch. The apparatus beings to hum, then it
begins to glow, then rumble, then really glow. Soon the sound is deafening
and the glow blinding. ____ gropes for the power coupling, but can't grope
too far, for fear of possibly wandering out from behind the blast shield. Just
when she doesn't think it can get any louder or brighter, the machine goes
silent and explodes in a rippling shock wave that turns her workshop almost
completely upside down. Everything is in shambles. The machine is ruined,
and ____ loses 3 Cleaning skill points.
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*Top Secret Researcher*
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Military Intelligence, otherwise known as AWXYMRAWN, has unearthed something
very important in the SimCity Desert. ____ has received a telegram that reads:
"____ stop top scret stop your eyes only stop have found an a stop l stop i
stop e stop n stop stop s stop p stop a stop c stop e stop s stop h stop i
stop p stop stop come to you know where at you know when stop this message
will self destruct stop. Fascinated by the thought of a small piece of paper
self destructing, ____ places the telegram on the table, but it just sits
there, benign as ever. Well, ____ does manage to decipher the military's
"intricate" code, but unfortunately has absolutely no clue about the time or
place where he's supposed to meet them and discuss the "you know what." So he
surmises they must be either be talking about the evcavation area, somewhere
out in the middle of the desert, or the secret underground military
installation he's heard talk of, somewhere off Interstate 51. Which one should
he try?
"Desert Site"
"Installation"
____ figures anything as big as a secret Military Installation can't be too
hard to find. So he checks his road map for the quickest route for Interstate
51, but is unable to find the highway listed anywhere. Undeterred, ____
requisitions a military grade Sports Utility Vehicle and drives out to where
he thinks the highway probably is. After an hour of driving ____ finally
decides that he doesn't even care about the top secret discovery, as the
military archaeologists most likely only unearthed some old defunct
refrigerator again. He turns the car around to head back to his office, but
the utility vehicle sputters to a near stand-still and the engine shuts off.
____ looks down at the dash only to discover that he's out of gas. He thumps
himself squarely on the forehead for having tried to take a vehicle rated less
than 10 miles a gallon in the city on a long road trip. ____ loses 2 Logic
Points for his complete and utter lack of forethought.
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*Theorist*
**********
With the recent complications arising from such concepts as dark matter,
wormhole theory, red vs. blue shift, superstring theory, ____'s own extra-
special relativity, not the mention the meta-spline reticulation debate, ____
has decided to take on a more rational approach to his theorizing. After all,
there are so many inconsistences and unknowns still lurking in the day to day
activities of Sims across the world. For instance, what happened to all the
pets in SimCity? One day they were there and the next day they were gone,
vanished without a trace. Or how is it that Sims are all able to carpool, but
yet not one Sim seems to own a car? Better yet, what's the deal with
"inventory"? How is it that no one seems to have a problem with the seemingly
infinite universe that exists within each and every Sim's pockets? But ____
needs to focus, and he needs a starting point. Should he start with the
tangible or the intangible.
"Tangible"
"Intangible"
The "SIMulated Guide to Discovering What Words Mean" describes the word
"Intangible" as being "the opposite of tangible," so ____ flips through a few
more pages to "Tangible", only to discover that its defination is "the
opposite of intangible"! Utterly frustrated ____ tosses the unhelpful
reference manual out of his office window and settles back to the task at
hand, discovering a theory pertaining to the intangible world. ____ stares
blankly out his window, then at his desk, then at his hands, then eventually
back out the window. Hours go by, and ____ is left wondering if there's really
anything left worth theorizing about. He decides that he's not yet ready for
the world of the theoretical and demotes himself back to Inventor for a bit
more hands on experience.
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