Anyway, back to the game. Balls of Fury is basically a touch screen version of Pong with special moves and a little polish on it. You'll have a top down view of a Ping Pong table and the stylus is used your control your paddle. Beyond that, the whole game is pretty much the same and somehow, actually less fun than playing Ping Pong in real life. Your opponents apparently rode the short bus to the competition because after a certain number of successful returns, they just give up and let you have the point. They seldom use their super moves and seem to be programmed to play as inefficiently as possible.
The saddest part is that comedian Patton Oswalt was involved with the film and therefore, he is in the game. He is just too funny to have something like this dragging down his reputation. Brian Posehn gets to make a music video with Anthrax and Oswalt gets stuck with this?! He must have entered a contest and lost.
If you do decide to get the game, or even try it, you'll notice that there are some unlockables and a few different modes to choose from. The game has both an Arcade mode (play until you lose) and a Story mode, which tracks the story of the film. There is a multiplayer option as well, but chances are if you like this game, you don't have any friends. Personally, I know that if someone told me they enjoyed Balls of Fury, all I'd hear is "Let's never hang out."
In the end, Balls of Fury is just another movie game that pushes the envelope of how bad things can get when someone says, "We need a movie tie-in game for our crappy film!" Seriously, Balls of Fury is a terrible movie with a terrible licensed game attached to it. This game's existence makes it even harder for me to accept that we'll probably never see a game based on Sophie's Choice, Beaches or Forrest Gump. Stay as far from Balls of Fury as possible; the movie sucks, the game sucks and I'd feel personally responsible if any part of this review made you think, "Hey, it couldn't be that bad…" It is. If you are desperate enough for entertainment to consider buying this game, just watch that Chris Crocker Britney Spears guy on youtube and laugh, laugh, laugh. What a weirdo.
In The End, This Game Hath Been Rated:
10%. Needs more cowbell.
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