By Gary Kearney

It’s not often that I find myself reading the License agreement to a game, but I somehow accidentally did that for Ubisoft’s PS2 game 187 Ride or Die. I think I was hoping to find out what the 187 meant in the title. I didn’t find that (my newest theory is that it’s the police code for homicide) but I did run across this little bit of truth: “The User recognizes that he uses 187 Ride or Die at his own risk.” I’m guessing that all games have an agreement that says the same thing...yet it really rings true with this little gem. 187 is not a good game and I just may not spend a whole lot of time telling you why because I would hate to spend more time writing a review than was spent on designing the game. OK, that was uncalled for. It’s just that I’m never happy when a crappy game gets released.

Don't worry, they'll be fine.

I get a very strong feeling that this is the type of game that was conjured up by a few guys in suits somewhere, not a game created by people that actually play and like games. 187 has several “hip” and “now” parts to it that read like a recipe: add one tiny part GTA and a bit of Mario Kart with one part Twisted Metal, stir in some bling, mix with a generous helping of curse words, add some babes and cook until street cred is firm. Someone took this puppy out of the oven way too soon. Instead of being a cool game with a tough attitude it comes across as wimpy wannabe.

187 Ride or Die is best described as a gangsta combat racing game. There is a storyline to the single player game that goes something along the line of your character, Buck, works for a rather large dude named Dupree. Seems that Dupree is having a little gang war with someone named Cortez and they decide the best way to solve this is for everyone to grab a ride and start shooting the snot out of each other. (Hee, hee...I said “snot.”) The gameplay while driving around and shooting up the neighborhood is fairly simple and actually not all that bad in small doses...very small doses. It’s kind of like a very urban Mario Kart with weapons that kill instead of bananas peels. You main goal is to almost always to finish first in getting around the street from one point to another. There are two things to know: how to drive and how to shoot. While driving you need to do the usual things like run over different icons for either weapons, health, or boost. One of the more interesting things that 187 does is how it makes the powerslide an integral part of the game. You must slide in order to gain nitrous boosts and you will certainly need that extra boost when you’re in the SUV. There are variations to this basic finish first formula. For instance there are escort missions and one where the last place car is eliminated after each lap. But basically all you need to know it to shoot everyone and you’ll be fine.

I mentioned that you’ll be in an SUV a moment ago. That is one of three type of cars you can chose from. Besides the SUV you can go old-school with a muscle car or try something a little newer with a sports car. The SUV, as you would expect, can handle more damage while the sports car is the fastest, leaving the muscle car as the in between car. I don’t have anything against the style of cars represented here, but I do have a issue with the tracks that are fairly washed out and boring. Oh, but I do like being able to pop out of the sun roof and shoot...that’s cool.

Maybe the weakest part of 187 is that it seems to be trying way too hard to be ghetto. This comes across through the story, language, and voice acting. I am certainly no saint when it comes to using inappropriate language, but there is really a lot of overkill done here in what sounds like an attempt to be taken as tough and street. To me it comes across as more comical and sad than anything. I’m no gangsta, but I can tell when others are faking it.

In The End, This Game Hath Been Rated: 47%.  All right, I really don’t want to waste any more of my time or yours with this. Let’s just leave things at this...if you like tons of bad words, lame stories, and repetitive gameplay revolving around guns and cars then try 187. Otherwise just go for a nice Sunday dive away from this game.