GODS: Lands of Infinity Review
Gods: Lands of Infinity. Now that's a bit of a grandiose title for a game, especially one with the kind of production values we've got here. Gods is obviously a "budget" title, which in the gaming world is usually marketing code for "crummy". Nonetheless, there are gems to be found among the coal of the bargain bin, so let's take a look at what we've got here.
Gods is an RPG game that puts you in the role of Vivien, a hero sent to another world by a god whose world is embroiled in a nasty god war. Her job is to track down the local gods and ask them for an artifact that can take care of the evil god on her world and end the war. That's about what I can tell from the confusing opening cinematics, anyway. It's hard to keep track of things when the gods have easy to remember names like Arsvaargh. Unfortunately, Vivien arrives at the new world sans powers and must begin her quest to stop a god war as your typical newbie level one adventurer.
I have to note at this point that Vivien is not your typical female RPG adventurer as she is given the voice and likeness of 2000's Penthouse Pet of the Year, Kyla Cole. Before the drool starts pooling at the corner of your mouth (or you send an angry email to your girl gamer clan), I need to mention that Cole is probably the most-clothed RPG heroine you'll ever find. Rather than show her in a flimsy get-up with an armored bra, the game's menus have her wearing full plate armor. While in game, most of the time the only image you get to see of her is a static headshot that sits near the bottom of the screen. You'll get to see her full body during the game's battles, but the graphics are at least a half decade behind the times and even her starting outfit is downright modest. I'm not sure what they were paying her for, but it certainly wasn't for her voice-acting talent.
The game itself is played from a first-person view and the first thing that you'll notice is that you are about a foot high. Either that or the game uses a kneecap cam. It's just plain odd to go about your travels and feel like you're the height of a flower, and I'm not sure what the developers were thinking when they locked the camera in at such an odd position. Once you decide to ignore your odd view of the world, the next thing you'll notice is that the world is populated by doppelgangers. There are only a handful of character models and even fewer voice actors. Two minutes into the game I came across a contingent of about five guards and each and every one was voiced by the same actor, and he didn't even bother to change his voice between each character.
